The culture of visiting the sick in Saudi Arabia is very much the same to what I have experienced in South Africa especially amongst the South African Muslim community. Muslim families in South Africa are usually very close knit and hence when one family member is admitted to hospital it is not unusual to see the whole family gathering at the hospital including, uncle and aunts, cousins, nieces and nephews and oh yes let us not forget the 45th cousins, neighbours and the extended family as well. Gori Khala and Choti Khala will most probably take turns to cook up a storm for the patient preparing soup, kheer or badam dood ( almond milk) and oh yes there is always plenty of extra pies and samoosas for the visitors that drop by the hospital to visit the patient. The first time I visited a sick patient in a Saudi hospital was a few years ago. Ummi was a frail octogenarian Saudi woman. She hailed from a very well educated and illustrious family. Month after month she would accompany her son to the pharmacy to collect her medication. Over a period of time I got to know her pretty well. She was not very fluent in English but she spoke enough to make me understand what she was trying to say. Most of the time we would converse with each other in Arabic. Her youngest son is a medical engineer and is part of the Medevac transplant team. Her eldest son is a successful businessman owning a few well established companies.Her daughters are all married and scattered around the Kingdom. She has a daughter in Makkah, Jeddah, Damaam and of course Riyadh. Whilst visiting her daughter in Damaam, Ummi fell from a flight of stairs and fractured her femur bone. Ummi was hospitalized for a few days in Damaam and then asked to be transferred to our hospital as she is more familiar with the medical staff here. On the night she was admitted, I received a call from her son informing me of his mothers plight. The next day I decided to pass by the ward and visit Ummi. Before making my way to the hospital, I stopped by a flower shop to get Ummi a bouquet of flowers to cheer her up. Arriving at the ward I was quite flabbergasted at the number of visitors Ummi had. All her kids, grandchildren, son in laws, daughter in laws and extended family members were in attendance. Ummis daughter from Makkah was her Miraafiq. A Miraafiq is basically a "sitter";someone who stays with the patient in the hospital and makes sure that the patient is comfortable throughout their stay. The sitter will assist the nursing staff in terms of bathing the patient, feeding the patient and also taking the patient to the toilet. The sitter is usually a close family member or a relative although I have seen families hiring people to be sitters. A few minutes into my visit, Ummis eldest grandson arrived with his wife and new born baby. He lovingly kissed his grandmother on her forehead and hands as a sign of tremendous respect. They wheeled in a huge trolley that had a large pot of food on it. A beautiful big carpet was laid out on the floor and everyone was asked to partake in the food including the nurse on duty who was from New Zealand and was pretty new to the culture and customs of the country. After digging into the rice and chicken we ended the meal on a sweet note with an assortment of Arabic pastries and chocolates. Ummis two grandsons are huffaaz, meaning that they have memorized the entire Quraan. So after having lunch, they sat beside her and were reading verses of the Quraan. Ummis daughter from Makkah brought for her zam zam water as well and they were all encouraging her to drink as much water as possible.The Prophet (saw) said,“For whatever object Zam-Zam is drunk, that object will definitely be fulfilled. If one drinks it with the purpose of being cured, then Allaah Ta’ala will grant cure for the drinker, or if one drinks it for his thirst to be removed then Allaah Ta’ala will remove his thirst. Because it is the well of Jibraeel (alaihi salaam), and with it Allaah Ta’ala quenched the thirst of Hadhrat Ismaeel (alaihi salaam).
The nurse from New Zealand was astounded at the fact that the two grandsons kept on blowing over their grandmother after reciting verses of the Quraan. This is known as Ruqya. Ruqya is seeking a cure for any illness by reciting verses of the Quraan and praying to God Almighty. As reported in Sahih Bukhari, the Prophet Muhammed (saw) used to treat with ruqya saying, "O the Lord of the people! Remove the trouble. The cure is in Your Hands, and there is none except You who can remove it (the disease). "
Within Saudi culture tremendous emphasis is placed on being kind to the elderly and looking after old and aged parents. This stems from the fact that the Quraan has mentioned quite clearly how we should be treating our parents. In the Quran, there is a very beautiful description of how parents are to be treated; Allah Says: "And your Lord has decreed that you not worship except Him, and to parents, good treatment. Whether one or both of them reach old age [while] with you, say not to them [so much as] 'uff' [i.e., an expression of irritation or disapproval] and do not repel them but speak to them a noble word. And lower to them the wing of humility out of mercy and say: 'My Lord! Have mercy upon them as they brought me up [when I was] small.'" [Quran 17:23-24].
Many Saudi families hire full time nurses for a sick family member. I know of one family that has two nurses and five other helpers for the mother of the house who is mentally ill after falling from the third floor accidentally. She is cared for like a queen. Her sons are by her side throughout the day and her every wish is fulfilled. The beautician comes to the house once a week to make sure that she is properly groomed and before every Eid she has henna applied to her hair and hands. Every effort is made to keep her happy despite the fact that she is not well mentally and physically due to a slight paralysis. Unlike in South Africa, in Saudi all patients admitted to hospital are provided with their own private room. Privacy is of utmost importance. The rooms in our hospital are all elegantly decorated. Each room is furnished with state of the art medical equipment. The doctors and nursing staff visit the patient with a laptop that is mounted to a stand. The doctor is able to gain instant access to a patients medical records, x-rays and blood tests. The doctor is also able to enter a prescription for the patient which is sent to the pharmacy immediately through sophisticated computer programs. In general, the hospital strives to be a paperless environment.Each room also has a beautiful leather relaxing chair with a foot rest.The bathroom is also specifically designed to be patient friendly.
A few months after visiting Ummi in the hospital she passed away quite peacefully after the morning prayers whilst sitting on her rocking chair reciting verses of the Quraan. She was a remarkable human being. She took me like a daughter and made me feel very much a part of her family.She is one woman that I will never ever forget in my entire life. The day she passed away I was filled with an inner sadness and emptiness. I felt as though my own grandmother had passed away.May God Almighty have mercy upon her and grant her the highest stages of paradise. Ameen!!
