Tuesday, March 31, 2015

Beware of the online womanizer

                                                     (Picture: www.thefrisky.com)

So yesterday afternoon I received a call from a facebook friend who also happens to be a personal friend of mine. She is South African but resides in a neighbouring African country. She urged me to write a post about Muslim men who use the internet and dating sites to satisfy their womanizing personality traits. A friend of hers was chatting to a South African Muslim doctor who befriended her on facebook. As they started chatting more often they exchanged telephone number and BBM pins. This man promised her the world. He said that he was interested in her and desired to marry her. One day she decided to surprise him by calling him at the practice. When he answered the phone he told her that he does not know her from anywhere. A whole different side to this man’s personality emerged. Naturally she was heartbroken. My friend decided to find out more about this doctor. It turned out that he was someone that she knew as he resided in the same town as her parents here in Johannesburg. He of course did not know her. So she sent him a friend request and the same pattern followed. He befriended her, exchanged BBM pins, promised her the world and when she called him he said that he does not know her from a bar of soap. May be someone else hacked his facebook profile and is now pretending to be him.

Recently, I received an inbox message from a Muslim man who obviously created a fake facebook profile to find women. This is the message he sent me, “Salaam. I am a 36 year old married Muslim man with 2 kids. You do not know me but I follow your posts. I must say you hot and intelligent too. I am looking for a mistress or a second wife for sexual reasons only. I do not want any more kids. The relationship would have to be secretive. Money is no object. I will buy you an apartment and give you a monthly allowance as well. My facebook profile does not have my real details. I will reveal my real identity in person if you agree to the arrangement.”

Recently, I severed ties with a friend who is a well known professional man but had the nerve to chat to other women on a dating site whilst claiming that he was enjoying getting to know me.  When I confronted him, his response was, “I love being close to a woman. You need to come to terms with the fact that if I am chatting to Sumayya, I am also chatting to 8 other women and getting to know them.” My response was, “Go to hell. You do not deserve a woman like me and I will never choose to be involved with a man that has no respect for a woman. You may be up there in front of your colleagues and the people you deal with. But in my eyes, you ‘re an ass.” The sad part is that this same person has a few unmarried sisters in his house. I know he would be devastated if someone hurt his sisters but it’s perfectly normal behaviour to hurt another woman. Why? Because it is not our own flesh and blood.

If you truly care for someone you will not be hurting them by visiting a dating site every now and then to check if there is someone better out there. In my opinion only a sick womanizing man would behave in this manner. These type of men are selfish. They have no respect for a woman. The only people they care for is their own family and of course themselves. But they fail to understand the concept of what goes around must come around. Today they have lowered the self esteem and morale of someone else’s daughter, tomorrow their own sister will be played.


My advice to all women out there is this: Be very careful with who you interact with online. There are loads of sick people out there. If you lonely and wish to be in a relationship with someone, rather ask a mutual friend or a family member to introduce you to someone.  Don’t become a victim to a womanizer. It’s just not worth it.