Sunday, July 3, 2016

We have lost the plot when it comes to Etiquette and Respect




On Friday I was quite disgusted at the behaviour of a sixteen year old Muslim boy who frequented the pharmacy to collect medication for his parents. His attitude towards my colleague was absolutely appalling. He was rude and abrupt and refused to answer important questions despite my colleague responding to him in a polite manner. At first I listened, then I could not take it any longer and I decided to step in. All I said was, "Why did you go to the mosque to pray Juma, when your attitude towards others is absolutely disgusting. If you cant respect the people who are trying to assist you, please leave." His face turned red and he then decided to keep his big mouth shut.

At the beginning of Ramadhaan , a 14 year old boy smacked an elderly man because he was reprimanded for making a noise in the masjid. This kind of disruptive bahaviour unfortunately continued for the entire duration of Ramadhaan. A few days ago, kids vandalized a door in the masjid whilst playing around with cold drink bottles. In addition to this they also vandalized a few cars outside the masjid. I think the parents of these kids should be held accountable for the damages caused. Clearly these parents have not brought up their kids in a disciplined manner thereby having no control over them. I don't blame the kids. Kids simply imitate the behaviour of their parents. I was told that the parents of some of these kids have a total disrespect for the masjid as well.Many of these parents are constantly fidgeting and playing around on their mobile phones whilst their kids run a mock disturbing the prayers of people who frequent the masjid sincerely..I think there is a total lack of discipline among the youth due to bad parenting. I think kids below the age of 7 years should not be allowed to frequent the masjid. Kids older than seven years should stand next to their fathers so that they can be properly supervised. The problem with parenting today is this... when a person complains to the parent about the child's bad behaviour or inappropriate actions, the parent becomes defensive. Instead of acknowledging the child's fault and taking action against the child, the parent chooses to fight with the person who's car was vandalized for example. This is why we are producing a generation of kids who are rotten in terms of behaviour and etiquette..Stop taking your child's part if they are wrong. Call me old school but I think corporal punishment should have never ever been abolished....

Teachers are not parents. Your home is your first school. I remember my childhood as though it was yesterday. Whilst dad was not very much the disciplinarian mom definitely was. Etiquette and manners was instilled into us from a very young age. It was almost as though home was an etiquette school. We were taught how to eat, how to sit gracefully, how to behave in the company others. Mom wasn't shy at all to reprimand us in front of anyone. It was her way of teaching us a lesson. Today, when I look back I am not at all sorry for the discipline that was instilled in me. 
Let's leave the children alone, our grown ups lack etiquette and discipline so how will the kids learn good habits. A friend of ours told us yesterday that a lady in pardah almost caused an accident by skipping the stop street. Instead of acknowledging her mistake, she decided to stick out her middle finger for the other motorists in full view of everyone including kids. So on the one hand you acting holy by wearing pardah and on the other hand your behaviour is in total disagreement to Islamic etiquette. To these women my message is clear, first go learn about etiquette and then act all holy by wearing pardah. Behaving badly in public and wearing pardah don't go hand in hand. That's not all. Ramadhaan is a time of change. It is the spring season in the Islamic calendar. It is a time to start afresh and mend your ways. But clearly this does not apply to everyone. A car with "holy" occupants were driving down main reef road full speed, trying to get home on time to break fast. Instead of exercising patience, the driver decided that he was going to hoot and shout at other drivers on the road, shooting through red traffic signals and in the process not only endangering his own life but endangering the lives of others. People like this make me laugh. You might be wearing Islamic attire, showing the whole world that you are a Muslim but your etiquette in public is pathetic, totally against the teachings of Islam. Allah did not say that you need to behave like a hooligan on the roads during Ramadhaan. Plan your day and try getting home on time. If you cant get home on time, break your fast in the car. Islam is practical. It has always been. The followers have made the religion an impractical one.....






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