Sunday, December 30, 2012

Riverview Spa - South Africa

Photo: My family with the owner's daughter, Elmarie....

A week prior to my departure from South Africa, my mom's sister decided to give mom and I a surprise by treating us to a hand and foot massage at the beautiful and tranquil Riverview Spa. If you are looking for a place to relax in the country side not too faraway from the city,  surrounded by picturesque hills with a river running through then Riverview spa is just the ideal place for you. Situated less than an hour's drive from Johannesburg and Pretoria, tucked away in a peaceful valley you can de-stress your mind, revitalize your body and soothe your soul.We arrived at the Spa around 11 in the morning and were welcomed by warm, friendly staff members.The owner's daughter Elmarie personally came by to introduce herself to us and also gave us a brief history about the spa and how it all started off. We were treated to welcome drinks and then made our way to the garden for our half an hour hand massage.The massage therapists were experienced and jovial. It was sheer magic being pampered in a peaceful ambience surrounded by the swimming pool and beautiful gardens whilst inhaling the fresh country side air.After our hand massage session we made our way to the Riverview Cafe where we indulged in a delicious vegetarian lunch. The kitchen at the spa prepared for us a snack platter comprising of cheese and corn samoosas, spring rolls and moons.We were also served delicious spinach quiche accompanied with a Greek and potato salad. After lunch we were once again whisked away to the garden area for our foot massage session. My mom suffers from arthritis and hence she commented that after receiving her massage she felt much relief in her hands and feet. The only disappointment was not being able to take a walk to the romantic riverside picnic area as we experienced a huge afternoon downpour. We were warned not to make our way to the river in the rain as we may slip due to the rocky steep incline near the river bed. Hence we made our way back to the Riverview cafe after the foot massage session for a late afternoon high tea. Riverview can accommodate up to 20 guests per day at the spa and 10 guests at a time to stay-over in their lovely private chalets.This is the perfect hide away for friends and family, close to all wedding venues in Muldersdrift and perfect for pamper days or break-awe’s combined with a relaxing day at the Spa. Riverview is a place with a heartbeat, a place with a difference, a home away from home. It was a day experience that I will cherish and remember forever. I had the opportunity of spending quality time with close family members and individuals that I truly care about. If you require more in depth information regarding all the treatment packages the spa has to offer I highly recommend you to visit their website.














Thursday, December 27, 2012

An 'Emerging Mystery' by Photographer Sebastian Farmborough

Photo: An Emerging Mystery by Sebastian Farmborough

A sweet message from a world class photographer and a truly remarkable human being.....Sebastian Farmborough

Hey, 

Please feel free to share the pic. It's attracted over 18,500 hits so far from 134 different countries and I'm hoping that sooner or later it might generate the kind of attention that would enable me to return and complete the project. 

Hope life is treating you well, Sebastian.

Whenever Western societies view a Muslim woman in hijab or niqaab, their first impression is likely to be one of negativity. A Mulslim woman in niqaab is usually perceived as being illiterate, backward and uneducated.When I first saw this image of a fully veiled Muslim woman in water, I was blown away by the beauty and sheer simplicity of it. Thank you Sebastian Farmborough for replying to my emails promptly and for also providing me with a link to your fascinating story. 

"The image is based on one of my very first experiences in Saudi Arabia: With the naked beaches of Barcelona a not too distant memory... I headed down to the Arabian Gulf for a dip. There, I became mystified by something black and obscure out at sea. It looked like a huge jellyfish. Then, as it approached, I realised that it was in fact a woman.

It was such an intense experience that I just had to capture it for myself. However, it was not until a few years later in Dubai, when I had acquired the equipment and expertise necessary, that I was able to execute it. Anyone trying to take a picture like this in Saudi Arabia would run the risk of ending up in prison, so in the more liberal country of the UAE, I was able to realise it.

It actually took me a year to find the right lady. Yes, there are lots of women with beautiful eyes in the Emirates, but finding an open-minded enough one to do it, now that was a challenge! 

The picture itself was taken at dawn on the Burj Al Arab beach. I chose that time, because I wanted extremely soft light to fall on her and the sun to reflect in her eyes. It was winter, so the sea was freezing and we were both deep into it. It was an incredible experience. The model and I had only met a couple of times prior to the shoot so we actually got to know each other as it went on, finishing with a nice hot chocolate on the beach afterwards. 

The photo is entitled "An Emerging Mystery" and I feel as though it is extremely symbolic of Muslim women's increasing prominence in the world, despite a continued mystery. The Saudi veil is so often portrayed negatively in the West that I hope to counteract that somewhat and prevent the Western public from being mislead. Many Muslim women actually choose to wear it and I am more than happy to respect that. 

The image marks the beginning of a project that I have been wanting to carry out for some time. All we ever hear about Saudi Arabia seems to be negative, where as having lived there for 3 years, I can assure you that the reality is quite different. In fact, there are many things that we westerns could actually learn from them. I really admired and enjoyed the strength of their friendships, the closeness of their families, their sense of humour, and how friendly and generous they are. With this and other images I would like to try and redress the balance a bit and produce a book reflecting the more magical aspects of the kingdom."

Source: 
http://blogs.tribune.com.pk/story/13355/the-veil-as-an-accentuation-of-beauty/

A sweet message from a world class photographer and a truly remarkable human being.....Sebastian Farmborough

Hey,

Please feel free to share the pic. It's attracted over 18,500 hits so far from 134 different countries and I'm hoping that sooner or later it might generate the kind of attention that would enable me to return and complete the project.

Hope life is treating you well, Sebastian.

Whenever Western societies view a Muslim woman in hijab or niqaab, their first impression is likely to be one of negativity. A Muslim woman in niqaab is usually perceived as being illiterate, backward and uneducated.When I first saw this image of a fully veiled Muslim woman in water, I was blown away by the beauty and sheer simplicity of it. Thank you Sebastian Farmborough for replying to my emails promptly and for also providing me with a link to your fascinating story. I would also like to take the opportunity to encourage one and all to kindly view Sebastian's website where you will marvel at his breathtaking photography.

"The image is based on one of my very first experiences in Saudi Arabia: With the naked beaches of Barcelona a not too distant memory... I headed down to the Arabian Gulf for a dip. There, I became mystified by something black and obscure out at sea. It looked like a huge jellyfish. Then, as it approached, I realised that it was in fact a woman.

It was such an intense experience that I just had to capture it for myself. However, it was not until a few years later in Dubai, when I had acquired the equipment and expertise necessary, that I was able to execute it. Anyone trying to take a picture like this in Saudi Arabia would run the risk of ending up in prison, so in the more liberal country of the UAE, I was able to realise it.

It actually took me a year to find the right lady. Yes, there are lots of women with beautiful eyes in the Emirates, but finding an open-minded enough one to do it, now that was a challenge!

The picture itself was taken at dawn on the Burj Al Arab beach. I chose that time, because I wanted extremely soft light to fall on her and the sun to reflect in her eyes. It was winter, so the sea was freezing and we were both deep into it. It was an incredible experience. The model and I had only met a couple of times prior to the shoot so we actually got to know each other as it went on, finishing with a nice hot chocolate on the beach afterwards.

The photo is entitled "An Emerging Mystery" and I feel as though it is extremely symbolic of Muslim women's increasing prominence in the world, despite a continued mystery. The Saudi veil is so often portrayed negatively in the West that I hope to counteract that somewhat and prevent the Western public from being mislead. Many Muslim women actually choose to wear it and I am more than happy to respect that.

The image marks the beginning of a project that I have been wanting to carry out for some time. All we ever hear about Saudi Arabia seems to be negative, where as having lived there for 3 years, I can assure you that the reality is quite different. In fact, there are many things that we westerns could actually learn from them. I really admired and enjoyed the strength of their friendships, the closeness of their families, their sense of humour, and how friendly and generous they are. With this and other images I would like to try and redress the balance a bit and produce a book reflecting the more magical aspects of the kingdom."

Source:
http://blogs.tribune.com.pk/story/13355/the-veil-as-an-accentuation-of-beauty/

Tuesday, December 25, 2012

THE SAUDI SPONSORSHIP SYSTEM- A backward, outdated system that has NO place in ISLAM......

http://www.arabianbusiness.com/rights-group-backs-saudi-sponsor-move-453752.html - Picture

For those of you out there who are not familiar with Saudi rules and regulations, let me give you a brief insight into the Saudi sponsorship system. All expatriates working in Saudi Arabia require a kafeel or a sponsor. It is the sponsors responsibility to obtain a valid iqama ( resident permit ) for the employee. Once the expatriate is issued with the iqama, he/she hands over their passport to the sponsor for safekeeping. Each time an expatriate wishes to travel outside Saudi Arabia, they need to apply for an exit/ re-entry visa from the passport office after receiving approval of leave by the department head.
Only some nationalities are allowed to apply for a multiple exit/ re-entry visa which is valid for a maximum of six months. If an expat is working for a huge organization, like the hospital I work for, then of course I do not really encounter any issues or problems as a passport office is located on the hospital premises.The department secretary usually makes sure that all visas and iqama renewals are processed on time. The biggest flaw in the sponsor system arises when cheap labourers arrive in Saudi Arabia from Indonesia, India, Pakistan, Sri Lanka, Bangladesh and the Philippines. Many of these employees have private sponsors and hence are easy prey for abuse and oppression.
On numerous occasions, employers withhold employee passports and fail to pay salaries that were initially discussed. In this case the entire sponsorship system is a form of modern day slavery.
A totally outdated, backward system that has no place within Islam. A few days prior to traveling to South Africa, I met a friend of mine for coffee. She was highly distressed. She is originally from India and her husband is from Pakistan. Her husband needed to travel to India urgently but was unable to do so has he first needed to renew his iqama prior to traveling. His Saudi sponsor passed away nine years ago and so the sponsors eldest son now became his kafeel (sponsor). This Saudi gentleman did not inform the relevant authorities of his fathers death and hence when the employee went to renew his iqama at the passport office he was told that it can only be done once the Saudi sponsor pays a fine of SR9000. After being informed about the outstanding fine, the Saudi gentleman told the Pakistani man that he does not have the money to pay for the fine and hence if the gentleman is really desperate to travel to India he should pay the SR9000. In another incident, an entire family residing in Medina has been destroyed due to the sponsorship system. The family arrived in Saudi Arabia 40 years ago from the Kandahar region in Afghanistan. The father worked as a cleaner at the Prophets mosque. After years of saving money, he opened up a small shop. With time his business began to flourish and his family grew as well. All ten of his children were born in Medina tul Munawwara. In fact despite their roots being Afghani, the kids behave like proper Saudi children. When I met this family for the first time a few months ago I initially thought that they were Saudis until they related to me their entire life story. They arrived in the Kingdom legally and had a Saudi sponsor. One day, this sponsor disappeared without any trace and hence their iqamas expired. Despite finding another kafeel they could not get their iqamas renewed without the written permission of the initial sponsor.The Saudi government deported the entire family back to Afghanistan. Overnight, they lost their home and business in Medina. Naturally the kids and the family could not adjust to a new foreign country. It was the first time that the children set foot on Afghani soil.They knew no other way of life other than the lifestyle they grew up with in Saudi Arabia. After a few years, the eldest son returned to Saudi on a valid iqama. Within a few months he called his family to Saudi Arabia on an Umra visa. Naturally his family needed to return to Afghanistan. But how could they return. Kandahar was invaded by American troops. Their family home was invaded as well and of course destroyed. They had no home to return to. The family continued to stay in Medina but have now become illegal depsite the fact that they have found a new Saudi sponsor who is willing to make their stay in the country legal. The eldest son has been from pillar to post trying to legalize his family's status within the Kingdom. Due to their illegal status only the one son works and has a valid iqama. The two eldest daughters of the house can not get married and this has created lots of tension for the parents of the home. Due to stress and worry, the father of the house has developed hypertension and diabetes. It is systems like these that cause many expats to develop hatred for Saudi Arabs. If Muslims can oppress Muslims then why should we be condemning the West. Why should we be standing up to western countries oppressing Muslims when fellow Muslims are oppressing each other. It is 2013, the days of slavery and barbarism are over. Surely, other systems can be put into place to ensure that no crimes or atrocities are committed by expats residing within the Kingdom. Having a Saudi sponsor act as a policeman is not the answer towards bridging kind and friendly relationships between the native Arabs and expats. There are many families out there who wish to legalize their status within the Kingdom but fail to do so due to the red tape and bureaucracy. This in turn opens up the doorways of corruption. Many families hand over thousands of riyals to individuals who claim that they can obtain valid iqamas and sort out their problems. These shady characters then disappear after receiving the money. Then, there are families out there who have obtained valid legal iqamas due to the wasta system. If a person is acquainted to a Prince or a high ranking government official, then naturally this individual would obtain an iqama within a matter of a few days. I always wonder if the Prophet Muhammed (saw) was alive, how would he feel or react to such laws and regulations that oppress rather than unite. Abu Metab ( King Abdulla) has done a lot for his people and in particular for Saudi women. I salute him for all his efforts during his reign. Recently, he has been ranked as the seventh most influential man in the world and the most powerful man within the Arab world. Surely with his power, he can eradicate this backward, outdated sponsorship system and grant refugee status to people like this Afghani family. There are thousands of legitimate cases in Saudi that need to be addressed. Many of these individuals are afraid of seeking help from Saudi courts and ministries out of fear of being deported back to war torn countries. To Saudi's out there, how would you feel if you resided in a country for 40 years, built a home for your kids, worked hard to make a decent living and then suddenly you were asked to leave the country overnight? Is this what Islam teaches us? Is this what out Prophet Muhammed (saw) taught us? Abdulla bin Umar narrated that the Prophet of Allah said, “A Muslim is a brother of another Muslim, so he should not oppress him, nor should he hand him over to an oppressor. Whoever fulfilled the needs of his brother, Allah will fulfill his needs; whoever brought his (Muslim) brother out of a discomfort, Allah will bring him out of the discomforts of the Day of Resurrection, and whoever screened a Muslim, Allah will screen him on the Day of Resurrection .”

Thursday, December 20, 2012

Have you been given a second chance to live?, I certainly have...

Camphorated Oil

Indeed, God Almighty works in mysterious ways and when I sometimes sit and ponder over my life events, I can't comprehend how everything fits together like a jigsaw puzzle...One event leading to another for the betterment of my own life. Sometimes we experience grief and sorrow and we wonder why certain things do not occur in our favour and yet when we ponder over the same situation years down the line we realize that what God Almighty had ordained for us was in actual fact a blessing in disguise.My life has been pretty interesting in a sense that I was granted a second chance to live. When I was a kid, whilst mom was in the bathroom I opened up the medication cupboard and drank a full bottle of camphorated oil. When Mom came out of the shower, she found me on the floor with my eyes rolling and she could smell the oil on my breath and of course she noticed the empty bottle. Mom could not drive at the time. However, our neighbour came home for lunch and so he rushed me to the nearest hospital..Naturally it was a trying time for the family but through the Grace of God Almighty I was discharged from the hospital after a few days. The irony here is that years down the line I landed up working in the very same hospital as an intern and assisted in saving the lives of many infants and kids who came to the hospital with accidental poisoning.
I guess I was always meant to be a pharmacist considering my early experimentation with medicinal products..LOL..

When the realization set in that I was granted a second chance to live, I decided from that day onward that I should lead my life to the best of my abilities in terms of positive outlook and positive attitude..I try my best to live each day to the fullest and I strive to go through each day doing some kind of good or spreading good to those around me. Life is very short and I wish to leave this world with a legacy behind. I wish for people to remember me not for the clothes that I wore or the car that I drove but rather for the person that I am in terms of character. For as the saying goes, be more concerned with your character than your reputation, because your character is what you really are, while your reputation is merely what others think you are.As a human being we are all riddled with flaws and weaknesses, but trying to achieve an exemplary character is better than not striving to achieve at all.

My advice to all my friends out there is this...Live each day as though it is your final moment.
Try doing one good deed for the day. A simple smile can make someone elses day. Open the door for a colleague, help someone carry their packets...By helping someone else you would find inner peace, happiness and contentment within yourself. And last but not least, "Life isn’t a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, chocolate in one hand, latte in the other, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming ‘Woohoo WHAT A RIDE’!"

Saturday, December 15, 2012

THE SAUDI MAN'S BISHT

man's bisht.jpg 
                                                  Bisht by Mokhtar Chahine
Article written by Rima Al- Mukhtar
A bisht is a traditional Arabian long cloak men wear over their thobes. This cloak is usually made of wool and ranges in color from white, beige, and cream to the darker shades of brown, grey and black. The word bisht is derived from Persian — to go on one’s back. Originally the bisht was worn in winter by Bedouins. Now it’s only worn for special occasions like weddings, festivals, graduations and Eid.
The bisht has been the choice of formal wear for politicians, religious scholars and high-ranking individuals in Arabian Gulf countries, Iraq and countries north of Saudi Arabia. This traditional flowing cloak is meant to distinguish those who wear it. People say no cloth can provide the distinction of a hand-tailored bisht. This is why the art of bisht tailoring is a skill handed down from generation to generation.
Abu Salem, a Saudi tailor from Al-Ahsa, said, “Bishts were first tailored in Persia. Saudis were introduced to them when bisht vendors came here for Haj or Umra.”
Al-Ahsa area in the Eastern Province has been home to the best bisht tailors for over 200 years and leading producers in the Gulf countries since the 1940.
Some families in Al-Ahsa inherited their forefather’s skill and continue to make bishts in their family name. You can find a bisht called the Al-Qattan, Al-Kharas, Al-Mahdi or the Al-Bagli.
Three types of embroidery are used in making the bisht: gold stitch, silver stitch and silk stitch. The thread is called zari and gold and silver are very common. “Black bishts with gold stitching is the most popular, after cream and white,” said Abu Salem. “In the early 90s new colors were introduced to the bisht market. Blue, grey and maroon are mostly worn by the younger generation. The older generation sticks to the traditional black, brown and cream,” he added.
Prices vary from SR 100 all the way up to SR 20,000 depending on the fabric, stitching, color and style. The most expensive, the Royal bisht is specially tailored for princes, politicians and the weathy. “These people usually choose black, honey, beige and cream for their bishts,” said Abu Salem. “They are always handmade and use gold or silver thread and sometimes a combination of both,” he added.
Abu Salem said, “There are two kinds of zari, the genuine which is silk or cotton yarn covered with pure gold or silver, and the imitation where the yarn is covered with silver electroplated copper wire. Each tailor has his own trademark zari design.”
There are three main bisht designs, the Darbeyah, Mekasar and the Tarkeeb.
Darbeyah is handmade with genuine zari embroidery and traditional patterns and the style is square and loose. Mekasar also known as Gasbi, has silk embroidery along the edge of the fabric.
“Tarkeeb means fitting and it comes with a Darbeyah design with gold zari embroidery on tailored bisht fabric,” said Abu Salem.
Until the invention of the sewing machine the original bisht was hand sewn. “These days most bishts are machine-made but some people prefer a handmade one for their finer detail,” he said.
Abu Salem said, “Tailoring Hasawi bishts is an art that requires accuracy and skill. The gold embroidery requires patience and takes many hours. The length of time depends on the style and design. Hand-making one of these bishts could take from 80 to 120 hours and four tailors, each with one specific task.”
The Hasawi, a special of Al-Ahsa, is the most expensive using camel or lama hair or goat wool with gold embroidery on the collar and sleeves.
Traditionally, the bisht has two sleeves but it can be worn with only one arm through the sleeve and the other wrapped around loosely and tucked into the side.

Source:

http://www.arabnews.com/fashion/traditional-modern-saudi-mans-bisht



Thursday, December 13, 2012

BIG FAT INDIAN WEDDING

http://www.caricature.com.sg/2007/01/caricature-theme-indian-muslim-wedding.html
" I'm tired and frustrated. Sometimes I feel I've had enough." said Jodi, a middle aged gentleman who specialises in stage decor for weddings.He works in collaboration with an events planner here in Johannesburg.Whilst having a hilarious conversation with him last night, I came to realise that I do not envy his profession at all. For those of you out there who have not attended or planned an Indian wedding let me inform you of how 'Big Fat Indian Weddings' really come about. In the past Indian weddings were simple and basic. There was nothing elaborate or fancy about them. My parents always recall attending weddings where paper rolls made up the table cloths and simple white plates and plain ordinary tumblers were used as crockery. In the middle of the table there would be one simple vase with a flower or two that made up the decor. Simple food was served like biryani and a sweet dish followed by tea accompanied with an assortment of cakes and biscuits. My folks always say that in those days the weddings were simple but they lasted. Nowadays, Indian weddings are grand and elaborate with one family trying to out smart the other one. Brides now travel abroad to do their trousseau shopping. Jewellery is usually custom made by designers in Dubai or India so that when the bride returns home she can brag about all the expensive designer wear she had acquired during her trip. For an events planner arranging an Indian wedding is always a nightmare. Many of the elite well to do families have a one week wedding celebration. There would be a henna party, a family barbeque, a day for the completion of the Quraan to bless the bride and the groom, the wedding day and then of course the walima function that is hosted by the groom's family. Usually, families make appointments with the wedding planner months in advance. Some brides even bring their uncle and aunts or cousins to meet with the wedding planner. So you can imagine what the wedding planner goes through when eveyone wants to give their input..." No, No,No...pink underplates are no longer in fashion, I want something else"......" But pink underplates do look stunning with the crockery"......

So for two hours the family bitches and moans ....errrr mind my language............about table cloths, underplates, crockery and chair covers and many of them still do not reach a definite consensus after their two hour appointment has elapsed. After numerous emails, phone calls and meetings, an agreement is reached and the poor events planner hands over a detailed quote to the brides family.As the wedding draws closer, the brides family starts calling the wedding planner every day to make sure that everything is under control. Most event planners would take fifty percent of their fee up front before the wedding and the rest of the money after the wedding on the completion of their job. Weddings are a stressful affair and usually a brides home becomes an abode of chaos and tension as the house is usually full of people, family and friends. The brides mother and sisters would usually shoulder most of the responsibility. The elderly women of the family would stay at the brides home for a week or two prior to the wedding. Some of the womenfolk are bright and bubbly and create a jovial atmosphere whilst some women simply come to the wedding home to stir up trouble within the family. My close friend who is an events planner recently related a story to me regarding a wedding event that he planned that stretched over seven days. On the first day he had to cater for Sunday afternoon lunch for 200 hundred people according to the contract. In typical "Indian style" 300 people came for the Sunday lunch. Naturally the food was short. Not the caterers fault of course, but naturally the poor events planner was in the firing line. On the third day of the wedding celebrations, the events planner only needed to provide crockery and table cloths for a simple buffet tea party after the completion of the Quraan by the womenfolk of the family. After despatching all the items, the caterer gets a call that he did not provide them with floating candles for the tables. Again, floating candles was not a part of the contract..Once again the caterer gets lambasted over the telephone by the bride, her mom or one of the 45th cousins or aunts. On the day of the wedding, the brides mom and extended family arrived at the wedding venue early in the morning. Everything was done perfectly, however, the brides aunt had to place her two cent input and ask the caterer to make a few changes. The brides mother was not happy with the changes and so once again the decor and draping had to be changed. Then the brides father had to have his say of course. The poor caterer had a hundred and one people sitting on his head. To make the situation worse, the brides cousins contacted the bride who was getting her hair and make up done and informed her that the hall does not look good. The bride in turn called the wedding planner and once again the poor soul was lashed out at by a highly strung bride. After a few calls, moaning and groaning the wedding venue was perfect. Their highly esteemed guests arrived and everoyne was taken a back by the beauty of the hall decor. As is typical of Indian weddings, guests are never appreciative of their invitations. They will still criticise and comment. " Oh my God, she is so beautiful but he is nothing to look at"....." She is so fair and he is so dark, beauty and the beast..what did she possibly see in him."......." Is that the brides mother? where is the grooms mom? Oh but that colour dress just didn't suit her at all" ...." The chicken was too salty and the steak was rock hard"....Some guests choose to bring containers to pack food in it to take home...." A wedding doggy bag lol". I guess it saves them the trouble and effort of cooking up a storm the next day after the wedding. What about those guests who have no patience whatsoever and start devouring the chevro, sukmook, papar, pickles and salad before the food is served and then start screaming at the waiters for more salad and pickles. They fail to realise that the catering company was only asked to prepare one salad bowl per table. Now when everything is greedily devoured the caterer is once again to be blamed. I am sorry to say this, but members of my community lack etiquette and discipline when it comes to attending weddings. In fact they lack etiquette across the board even when it comes to visiting the sick.
After a few hours of partying, meeting and greeting and overindulging at the wedding, guests leave and the brides father is down a few thousand bob with still a few thousand more that he still needs to cough up. In the mean time the happy couple leave for honeymoon to some exotic location. I always maintain that dating someone is different from a marriage type relationship. It is only once you stay with someone permanently that their true colours actually come to the surface. So during the honeymoon , the couple realise that they are not compatible with each other. The bride calls her family and complains about the groom and naturally the groom complains to his family about his wife's dominating attitude...." She wants to wear the pants and I just can't handle that."
Arguing ensues during the honeymoon and naturally when the couple return their families become involved in trying to patch up the relationship. Words are exchanged with both parties blaming each other until both families agree on a divorce. The girl returns to her family home with her poor dad still having to fork out mega bucks for a failed marriage.Weeks go by and the catering company now starts calling the family for their final payment. The brides father now starts playing hide and seek as he does not have the money to settle the bill. On the wedding day everything looked picture perfect. How did the two sweet, innocent looking mother in laws suddenly turn into 'murder in laws'?

Dear readers, this is how our Muslim weddings have become. This is what happens when human beings emphasize on materialism rather than religion and spirituality. People are getting married for the wrong reasons. Families can spend hundreds of thousands of rands on a wedding but they fail to pay their zakaat or give charity to the poor.Having a lavish, grand wedding does not make a person a great individual. Guests attend the wedding, eat a plate of food and then leave. Over a short period of time the wedding is forgotten. A great human being is one that is humble and down to earth despite having excessive wealth. A great human being is an individual who spends money on improving the lives of his fellow human being by building schools for the underprivileged, constructing hospitals for the ill and providing food to the malnourished. People will not remember you by the wealth that you possess but rather you will be remembered for the good work that you carried out in this world.Thousands of people will pray for your well being after assisting them during their times of need and difficulty. How can people throw away a million rand on a wedding when fellow human beings are dying of starvation and illness?Our weddings of today have become a mockery to the sunnah of our beloved Prophet Muhammed (saw)..It is all about pomp, grandeur and trying to outdo each other with catastrophic results at the end. Be simple, lead a simple existence, for verily simplicity is the ultimate sophistication.

Monday, December 10, 2012

THE BUS RIDE

 

I usually travel in Riyadh city to do my errands or go out shopping in a private car. I am fortunate enough to have many Saudi friends who would send their driver to pick me up when the need arises.
However, three days prior to my trip to South Africa, I decided that I would hop on to the hospital bus for a bit of change and also to meet different people. Whilst sitting in the bus I realized that there were so many di
fferent nationalities on board. There were two Indian ladies sitting right at the back of the bus on the last row, the row that most of us wanted when we were in school especially during excursions.They were probably from Kerala, south India.The one lady had henna on her hands in a beautiful intricate design and her friend who was more on the plump side had the most lovely smile I ever seen. Despite being slightly overweight she had a beautiful face. She was fair with flawless skin and green eyes.They both came across as individuals with a friendly and pleasant demeanour. The women were speaking in their own Malayalam language. In front of them there was a group of Filipinos who were quite noisy and loud but at the same time they were very happy and alive. They were deeply engrossed in their own conversation which was naturally in Tagalog. Then came the two American women who were in their late twenties. They were sitting just behind me and did nothing but complain from our departure until we reached our final destination which was Hayat Mall. I wonder why do people reside in a country if they are so miserable and unhappy. They were complaining about the abaya, about the hospital systems and policies and of course how they disliked Arab people in general.The only thing they both seemed to love was the date shop in Kingdom mall that specialized in parcels and gifts made with a variety of dates. In front of me there were two South African women who hailed from Soweto. They were both nurses and assumed that I was a Saudi woman until I introduced myself to them. The one woman was out and about shopping for her eldest son's wedding. They were both bright and bubbly wanting my input and opinion about wedding dresses and shoes. Thandi was however disappointed that she did not receive any overtime shifts this month as her ward has been quiet due to the Eid holidays that have just passed by. She desperately requires extra money to pay off a huge house bond and also to buy gifts for the family with Christmas just a stones throw away. As I was chatting to them my mobile phone rang. It was Mrs S. She is an Indian woman who is married to a Saudi man. Actually her story is quite remarkable in a sense that she got married at the age of 14 to a man who was 50 years old. Her husband visited India years ago and fancied her beauty whilst she was walking down the road. He found out where she stayed and then visited the family home asking for her hand in marriage. Her father naturally refused the proposal but her mother insisted that she marries the man as he offered the family a high amount of dowry. Her husband is now old and unable to support his family and so she is forced to work. Luckily her kids are all grown up now and hence have become a pillar of strength and support in her life. Her sister was also married off to another Saudi man who is forty years older than her. Her husband is a very wealthy man but also a very cunning and dominating individual who does not allow his wife to go out of the house except on Thursdays. She lives in a huge house that has all the amenities and luxuries that anyone could possibly desire but somehow deep inside she feels as though she is a prisoner. She feels as though she has lost her autonomy and individuality. Her husband does not allow her to meet her sister or other family members and hence every Thursdays both sisters make a plan to meet at a park or shopping mall where they would pour their hearts out to each other. Very often they would invite me to join them for dinner or a picnic at the park. I was chatting to Mrs. S in Urdu and hence when I completed my conversation with her the two Pakistani women across me, on the opposite side of the aisle were astounded. Eventually, the lady closest to me plucked up the courage to ask me where do I come from,"Excuse me, Aap kahan sa aati hai? Aap Pakistani hai?."
'Nai Nai, mein Pakistani ladki nahin hu.." I replied. " I am South African."
"Nahin Aap South African nahin hosakti....Aap urdu jaanthi hai....Yeh to bahoti herani ki baat hai." She continued. She insisted that I can not be a South African woman as my Urdu was quite fluent in her opinion. She wondered how did I learn the language. The truth is I do not know myself how I picked up the language as neither of my parents speak Urdu. My roots go back to Gujurat in India and hence our home language is Gujurati. I continued having a brief conversation with the two Pakistani women as Baba, the middle aged Saudi driver drove through the busy streets of Riyadh. Traffic in Riyadh is horrendous throughout the day. Baba was singing away until the bus came to a screeching abrupt halt. One car tried cutting right in front of us causing baba to apply sharp brakes. Baba was so annoyed that he opened the window and started shouting at the driver of the beautiful black BMW. The man in the car was a young Saudi gentleman who seemed to be in a great hurry. After sternly shouting at the man, Baba closed his window and continued singing as the 1973 rickety bus made its way towards the mall. As my friend Ali always says, " It is 2012. These 1973 models seriously need to get off the road....PAT PAT PAT PAT PAT ARRRAY HAT" In front of the Pakistani women there were two middle aged Canadian women. The one lady is a laboratory technician and the other is a specialist physician. Both women were deep in conversation about their children. Jenny was upset about the fact that her son who just turned 21, has not left the family house. She wants him to get his own house and lead his own life.She has no desire or intention of supporting him any further.At this point I thought to myself how western culture is so different from Middle Eastern or Indian culture. In the Arab and Indian world, kids usually leave their parents house when they get married especially female kids. Of course my situation is quite different. I was brought up in a very broad minded, liberal home where my parents allowed me to fulfill my dreams and explore the world on my own. Numerous thoughts ran through my mind during the short thirty minute bus ride. With six nationalities on board one bus chatting and getting along with each other, wouldn't it be awesome if everyone across the globe just got along with each other? Wouldn't the world be a pleasant place if everyone simply respected each others religion, cultures and belief systems? Eventually, the bus came to a halt just outside Hayat mall. The ladies were all pretty excited to exit the bus and make their way into the shopping center to see what the designer shops had on offer. Baba looked visibly tired and fatigued after manoeuvring the bus through heavy traffic and narrow side streets in order to get to the mall as soon as possible. As I made my way to exit the bus, baba recognized me and his wrinkled face suddenly beamed with a smile. " kayfa 7aalak ya binti...shun akhbarak.....kayfa 7aalu ahwaalik....kullu taiyyibeen, kuwaiseen...".....he continued. He enquired about my well being and my family as he met my mom on numerous occasions during her shopping trips to Riyadh. Baba is a Bedouin man and hence does not speak a word of English. I continued the conversation with him in Arabic and then I noticed the two Pakistani women staring at me once again after looking at each other in confusion. I guess they still not satisfied with the fact that I am a South African woman. This is the power of language I guess. Through language I have made many friends throughout the globe. Language breaks barriers. As Nelson Mandela once said," If you talk to a man in a language he understands, that goes to his head. If you talk to him in his language, that goes to his heart." Having said that...have a good day everyone....until the next bus ride...........

Thursday, December 6, 2012

Madrassa An - Noor for the Blind



A few days ago en route to our holiday apartment in the Margate area, situated on the Kwazulu natal South Coast, my dad wanted our guest from Madina and I to vist Madrassa An- Noor for the blind.The institute is situated in the Pietermaritzburg region and is surrounded by beautiful picturesque hills. Despite being situated just off the main national highway, it feels as though the school is located in the country side. When we arrived at the institute the first thing that caught my attention was the beautiful horses that roamed around freely on the premises. Later on I discovered that the horses were in fact donated to the school. The blind students ride the horses on a daily basis for recreational activity. The horses are trained to cater to the needs of the blind rider steering clear of any obstructions like trees or huge boulders. The day we visited the school, the principal was abroad attending a conference related to the latest technology and learning apparatus for the blind. A teacher from the school warmly welcomed us and gave us a brief tour of the premises. I was very impressed with the high level of cleanliness in the school. Everything was arranged immaculately.We walked from class to class meeting and greeting all the students. The school has 30 students that hail from 14 different countries. There are students from South Africa, Kenya, Malawi, Malaysia, Palestine, England,India, Pakistan, South America, Panama, Comoros, Malawi, Lesotho and Kenya. Our guest from Madina and I heard the students recite verses from the Quraan along with Ahaadith from Sahih Bukhari. Tears rolled down my eyes when I heard the student from India reciting verses from the Holy Quraan in the most beautiful voice I ever heard. Almost half of the students present at the institute were not born Muslims. They have reverted into the fold of Islam. The school also has a recording room whereby scholars render their services by reciting verses from the Quraan or relating stories pertaining to Islamic jurisprudence. The recordings are then compiled into a CD so that blind people who can not study at the institute due to unforeseen circumstances, can still access the CD's by ordering it and have it delivered to their homes. As the teacher quite correctly pointed out to me,' if a blind person can not come to the knowledge, the knowledge can go to them.' Whilst chatting to one of the students, I discovered that he had come into fold of Islam after exploring the topic of religion whilst at university. What was so remarkable about this student was the fact that he had traveled two years ago for Hajj from South Africa all by himself. He was very pleased to have met our guest from Madina tul Munawwara and asked him to pray for his parents. His family have not reverted to Islam but they respect the fact that he is a Muslim and have also visited him at the institute. Our guest from Madina speaks a few languages and hence the little boy from Palestine took a liking to the gentleman. They conversed happily in Arabic and also exchanged telephone numbers. The teacher told me that the boy was his parents most beloved due to the fact that he was a blind child. The family were always overly protective of him. Yet inorder to seek knowledge he traveled to South Africa all alone. It was a tremendous sacrifice on the part of the parents letting go of their beloved son. Madrassa an Noor is the only school in South Africa that prints Arabic material into Braille for blind students. The machine that does this conversion is manufactured in the United States. One machine costs R700 000 and the school has two of these technological wonders.I was given a brief demonstration on how the system works. Normal books are scanned into the computer and then converted into Braille. Once the conversion is done, the Braille Place machine prints out the pages containing the Braille text. I was also informed that initially the Non Muslim community that reside around the institute were apprehensive about having a Muslim school in the area. I always believe that a lack of knowledge always breeds ignorance. After the institute invited members of the community to the  premises to observe the kind of learning activities that are carried out there, many Non Muslim blind elderly people have also started frequenting the facility to utilize the games, toys and other apparatus that are specifically designed to cater for the needs of the blind individual. This is a perfect example of bridging community ties. Its costs the institute approximately R100 000 a month with an average of R3000 per student. Students are provided with their own personal computer, clothing, food, housing facilities as well as a plane ticket on a yearly basis to visit their family. At present the school only has male students. However, there are plans in the pipeline to construct a female boarding school facility as well. I strongly urge everyone out there to please make a contribution towards a worthy cause so that this good work can continue for years to come.

Kindly send your donations to: Madrassa An- Noor for the Blind,
                                                   Standard Bank of South Africa
                                                   Pietermaritzburg
                                                   Lillah Acc: 250376512
                                                   Zakaat Acc: 052195392
                                                   Swift code: SBZAZAJJ


I pray that this institute grows from pillar to pillar and from strength to strength. May God Almighty bless the teachers of the institute for their hard work and dedication. Ameen.
As a side thought, I always observe that the youth of today are idle minded basically engrossed with the mobile phone, computer games, playing with the Ipad or some other technological gadget.
Parents should encourage their kids to visit institutes like these to render voluntary services. These students feel happy and loved when guests visit them. It motivates and encourages them to pursue their studies. Also, by visiting these institutes, it makes one realise just how much we have to be grateful and thankful for at every moment of our lives. We need to thank God Almighty for the bounties that He has bestowed upon us. It would give the youth a sense of appreciating the finer things in life rather than being carried away into a materialistic bandwagon that has suddenly become a norm and a way of life.

For further information and contact details kindly visit their website:
http://www.mnblind.org/?id=101
 

 


 

   






 

Monday, December 3, 2012

Image Lifestyle Wedding and Conference Venue



 

On the 23rd of November, a week ago, my family and I were invited to the launch of the Image Lifestyle wedding and conference centre in conjunction with Unusual Functions. The event seen the coming together of numerous entrepreneurs, businessmen as well as government officials for a night of glitz, glamour and live entertainment.There were many guests from abroad who traveled to South Africa especially for the event. It was quite a pleasure meeting individuals from Saudi Arabia, Iran, Pakistan as well as from China. Guests were warmly welcomed by specially trained event specialists and were escorted to their seats after taking a photo at the foyer. Many media personalities also graced the event. Guests were blown away by the sheer magnitude of the hall along with the breathtaking decor.Opulent chandeliers graced the ceilings accompanied with elegant lounge suites and regal carpets. All the art pieces that adorned the walls were painstakingly created  by a charismatic and dynamic artist, Fazal Casetti Docrat. I was so excited to have met him and his family after many years. The master of ceremonies for the evening was Mr. Bushan Das who also entertained the crowd by singing a variety of songs like Chamak Chalo along with a few golden oldies as well. The opening ceremony kicked off with a rendition from the holy Quraan. All guests were then asked to rise for the South African National Anthem as the Gauteng Premier Nomvula Mokonyane and her entourage were also present for the event.This was followed by a talk on Islamic Finance by Moulana Ragie.I found his speech to be quite thought provoking in a sense that he pointed out how Islamic Finance can have a positive impact on the global community at large basically reinforcing the fact that Islam along with its various rules regarding finances is not just for Muslims but for Non Muslims as well. Guests were treated to a five course meal whilst being entertained by live dance performances by two separate dance academies. Chicken salad and vegetable soup complimented with rolls was served as a starter. Steak roulade garnished with macaroni and masala chicken was served as a main course. Towards the latter part of the night guests then made their way back towards the foyer area where beautiful tables were laid out with an assortment of cakes, biscuits and desserts.It was an ideal opportunity for guests to interact and socialize with each other. I found the behaviour of some of the guests to be quite appalling though. Despite hailing from elite financial backgrounds, many of the guests were packing cakes and desserts in the decorative boxes that were on the dinner tables and taking them home. Chinese spoons filled with small portions of desserts were taken away by greedy guests as well.

Mr. Sayed Hussein Mia who is the chairman of the SHM group of companies was also invited to the event but extended an apology through his daughter for not being able to grace the function. His daughter however, used the event as a launching platform  for her newly acquired Middle Eastern clothing range "Shukr". Models strutted their stuff on the catwalk. I must admit though that I was not impressed with the range at all. I found the clothes to be old fashioned, mediocre and simply out of tune with the latest styles and emerging trends in Islamic clothing. Bold floral scarves matched with plain cotton pants and tops doesn't do it or me at all.It is a range that has seen its days in the Middle East a long time ago. The "Inspired" range of abayas were also showcased at the event. This range of abayas are designed in Dubai and retail in South Africa for between R2000 to R5000. Whilst many of the local South African Muslim women are gaga over this range of abayas, I personally only found a few of the abayas to be worthy of the price tag. The Image Lifestyle wedding and conference centre also boasts a bridal gown showroom along with abayas by " Unusual Couture". This range of abayaat is designed in Saudi Arabia. Each abaya is elegant and beautiful with a reasonable price tag. The premises also renders the professional services of a hair stylist, make up artist, along wih a fully kitted spa. My heartiest congratulations to Mr. Altaaf and Mr. Aadil Saith for making sure that the premises has all the amenities available in order to make that "special day" a memorable event. The venue is centrally located in the heart of Fordsburg allowing for convenience in terms of traveling distance and also allowing foreigners who grace the venue for conferences to be able to soak up the rich cultural heritage and history of the Fordsburg area.

If you wish to utilize the services of the Image Lifestyle wedding and conference centre kindly contact the celebrity events planner Mr. Aadil Saith at:

(w) 0027 11 413 2091
(m) 0027 (0) 827355559