Sonu Nigam - my first crush, my mentor, my hero and my inspiration

When satellite television first came to South Africa it was a novelty, an absolute craze that everyone had to have. I can clearly remember the day our DSTV system was installed. There was a sparkle in my eyes and a huge smile on my face. Finally I was able to watch so many channels that pertained to my culture and language. Whilst switching channels for the very first time I came across SAREGAMA on Zee TV. The program was presented by none other than the living legend Sonu Nigamji. For my family and I watching Sonuji on television for the first time was undoubtedly love at first sight. We couldn't get over his cute smile coupled with his boy next door looks, the designer clothing he wore and of course the exemplary character and respect that he portrayed towards his elders. My family and I never missed a SAREGAMA episode. In fact we loved the program so much that we literally recorded each episode. I always dreamt of meeting this living legend and dad use to encourage me to write letters to ZeeTv for his attention in the hope that he would reply. I sent numerous letters but received no replies.But this didn't discourage me at all. I always had hope that one day I will meet this shining star. Anyway, one Saturday morning as we drove towards my grandmother's home, dad switched on Lotus fm only to hear that Sonu Nigam would be performing live in South Africa at the Standard Bank Arena. I was over the moon. Naturally dad arranged for tickets and of course we went to the concert as one big happy family. I can still remember the way Sonu ji danced to his song"TU".After the concert everyone left the venue. I refused to leave until I had a chance to meet him. The MC of the show came up to me and tried pacifying me. He said, ' My dear, give me your CD I will have it autographed for you.' Naturally I obliged. When he returned with the CD that now had my name on it in Sonuji's handwriting I was thrilled but not satisfied. Mom and I wanted to meet him in person. We decided to run back stage with two security guards following us in haste.Nanaji followed us too lolol. Eventually we found the room where Sonuji and his beloved mom were sitting. I knocked on the door and walked into the room. He then signaled for the security to leave us alone.I was a starstruck teenager and couldn't believe that I shared the same space with a living legend. I can never ever forget the proud smile that Sonujis mom had on her face as she watched us engaging in conversation with a son that she adored with all her heart.May her soul rest in peace. After that unforgettable meeting little did I know that my relationship with Sonuji will last for almost 17 years. Not only is he a singer that has been blessed with a golden voice but he has a heart of gold too. Sonuji might be a superstar to the world but to me he is a mentor and an inspiration. I have not met a more humble and down to earth human being ever despite his huge success and fame.He has never forgotten his roots and to him humility is a very important quality that a human being needs to have. He is widely read and has quite an interesting philosophy about life and living. Through him I have seen and understood the many facets of life.Dad always told me that in order to be the best in life you don't need a certificate or a piece of paper. Be like Sonu Nigam. He doesn't need awards to validate that he is the best in the Indian music industry. The world knows that he is undoubtedly the best.My Nana use to be so emotional whenever he heard Sonuji singing. He felt as though the late Rafi Sahab lived inside of him. Sonuji inspires me to be a good human being through his unselfish acts of kindness towards others especially towards the orphaned. I am truly blessed and honoured to be in touch with such an amazing soul. Hence on this day 30 July 2016, I would like to take this opportunity in wishing my first crush, my mentor, my hero and my inspiration a very happy birthday. May God Almighty grant you many, many more years of good health, wealth, peace and prosperity! Ameen.....Love you loads to the moon and beyond!

CPL T20 2016 - Dev's Caribbean cricketing experience

International cricket match referee, Devdas Govindjee shares his Caribbean travel experience with all the blog readers. I was joking with Dev, that he has in fact become a travel correspondent for this blog.I am so blessed to be acquainted with such a wonderful human being who loves to impart and share his knowledge and experiences with the rest of the world.

UPDATE 1 ST KITTS


It has been quite a long break for me from sending out a mail updater- since my return from the U/19 Cricket world Cup in Bangladesh I have had shorter stints in the UAE and then in Zimbabwe & then a lovely break back in Port Elizabeth.

The trip out to CPL 2016 started last Monday 27th June with flights out of Port Elizabeth to Heathrow London- from Heathrow had to make our way to Gatwick for the flight out to Antigua for a short stop-over & then into St Kitts.

By the time I settled into the room at the lovely Marriott Resort & Royal Beach Casino it was 7.30 with my luggage following at around 11.30 pm – that would mean it would have been Wednesday morning back in South Africa ( 6 hours time difference)

Wednesday was taken up with visits to Warner Park for the venue inspections and then an early evening meeting with the two teams that were playing the first game here on Thursday 30 th.
Warner Park is the home of the St kitts & Nevis Patriots which this year is being captained by Faf Du Plessis of South Africa- they also have Tabraiz Shamsi the unorthodox left- arm spinner & PE’s own Jon Jon Smuts playing and have SA’s Eric Simons as coach .

Since all of that, there has now been 3 matches completed and the 4th and final match here this evening at 7. Everything has gone wonderfully well and we have had days off on Friday as well as yesterday and of course match days as well if the match starts only at 7 pm. The Sat Match was at 12 and Sunday we had a 4 pm match.

It was wonderful to get back into the city centre of Basseterre- the Port Zante area in particularly vibrant on the days when a cruise liner docks with all the Indian owned jewelry stores doing excellent business with the tourists – depending on which ship is docked they could be from the USA or other parts of the World.


Sun 17 July 2016

This mail was started while I was still in St Kitts but never got down to completing it for various reasons- mostly as a result of the busy schedule that I have had.

After St Kitts and the matches there, we left on Wed 6 July for Georgetwon Guyana- the home of the Guyana Amazon Warriors and the stadium is called Providence Stadium.

It was my first visit to Guyana and it is fascinating that Guyana is actually on the mainland of South America! Please google the map !! It is Suriname as Eastern neighbours, Venezuela as Western & Brazil as Southern neighbours. It is the only English Speaking country in South America but forms part of the Caribbean.!

Georgetwon has it’s own charm but do not expect to find it anything like a typical West Indies Island- it has more of a colonial city feel with colonial names and statues still a reminder of the links they all maintain with the Crown!
Our hotel was the lovely Marriott overlooking the ocean but also a reminder that Georgetown is a River port with the Demarara flowing into the Atlantic.

Found some interesting walks that we could do each morning along the Seawall remembering that much of Guyana is below sea level.

Each Island /Country in the Caribbean has it’s own currency as well as it’s own exchange rate so one has to get used to having all sorts of Dollars/Coins in one’s wallet.

The atmosphere in the Providence Stadium was unbelievable- having done 30+ IPL matches over the years, this is by far noisier and the locals come out to support in their thousands- getting into and out of the stadium without our Police Outriders would be virtually impossible as supporters line the streets cheering and
waving to their own heroes – Guyana celebrated it’s Golden Jubilee Independence earlier in the year and everywhere the flags of the country can be seen as well as symbols of the Jaguar which is the national animal. The Green/Yellow & Red colours are draped everywhere!.

On Wednesday 13 July we left Georgetown and headed for Kingston Jamaica- we traveled aboard Caribbean Airlines with a stop in Port of Spain Trinidad then onto Kingston Jamaica.

I had been to Kingston a few years ago to do a West Indies vs Ireland Series of matches so it was really good to check once again into the Pegasus Hotel.

Directly across the road is the delightful Emancipation Park- I simply love this concept & firmly believe that each city should provide a similar area for it’s residents- the park has an immaculate 500 Meter Walking/Jogging Track with clear signs indicating to walk only in one direction- from early morning people walk or jog with the beautifully kept flowers/shrubs/trees providing such a stunning setting of peace & outdoor pleasure.

Again this mail has been interrupted and finally I am hoping to complete it today ( Tue 19 July).

In the interim we had a day off on Sunday & headed out of Kingston on a very modern Highway (Toll Road) to Ocho Rios – this is about 75 kms away – we were to experience something very special- a visit to the Dunn River Falls & further on the Island Gulley Falls or the Blue hole.

It turned out to be one of the most amazing days I have ever experienced- the Dunn River Falls has everything organized down to selling a visitor the necessary pair of water shoes and provide lockers for clothes as well as a guide to take groups through the challenge of climbing into the 600ft falls – starting at the base of the falls we were hand-in-hand forming  daisy chains we made our way through one area to another – swimming gear is essential because all traversing is through water and via footholds on rocks- it was simply fantastic – with no cameras allowed unless you have a water proof one I did mange to get some pics as one of the umpires had a water proof cover for his mobile phone. They do sell you a video/pics if so desired of course.

The Blue Hole was just as beautiful in the White River Valley and is a hidden gem - paradise in the rain forest
mountain regions. The Cascades of Water falls gives one a Blue hole of 20-25 ft depth for jumping into from various perches and even a zip line fall into it.

There are some pics on my fb page to try to give you an idea of this experience- but it does no justice to it at all.

Anyway- there is one more match here in Jamaica tomorrow evening before our team of match officials ( the other team now in St Kucia having done Trinidad & Barbados) head off to Fort Lauderdale in Florida – we will fortunately have about 6 free days as the 1st match in Fort Lauderdale is only on 28 July.

There has been much hype about this new venture – the first time the CPL taking matches outside of the Caribbean in its 4 year history and playing on mainland USA- the interest has been phenomenal and with double headers also on the schedule it should provide the cricket-starved ex-pat communities something to look forward to. I have been to the venue at the Central Broward Regional Park (CBRP) before and it is a wonderful facility so we are all looking forward to being there on a historic occasion.

I have one of my best friends in West Palm Beach which is only an hour away so am sure there will be lots of opportunities for getting to know Fort Lauderdale over the next week. On 1 August I head back to the Caribbean to St Kitts for the play-offs and the final which incidentally will be played on my birthday- fine way to celebrate so far away from home.

I return to SA on 11 August so am now well over the mid-way stage of my 2016 CPL experience.

To view pictures of Dev's trip, feel free to visit his facebook page!!

Bisexuality - A growing trend in the Muslim community

24 June 2016                                                                               www.weusedtobeyou.com Dear friends, My Facebook page is aimed at bridging cultural differences between people, relaying news and information and of course interacting with many people from all over so that I can learn about their customs and traditions.If someone out there needs assistance with regards to medication etc I will help... My Facebook page is not a dating site.. neither is it a matchmaking site and if you going to inbox me asking me for my mobile number or asking me on a dinner date or coffee date or a movie date.I will ignore you. I was emptying my message request folder this evening and I came across this message that was sent to me in March this year. I am speechless and disgusted. 'Salaams. Firstly this profile was created to allow me to be discreet. The profile picture is not me. I am a  Muslim woman from Emmerentia. I am bisexual. I am equally attracted to females. My husband knows this and he is happy about the sexual possibilities we can encounter. You are a very gorgeous attractive woman. My husband is attracted to you as well.You have piercing eyes. Would you be interested in engaging in a bisexual relationship with us at our home. We are a young couple, early 30's. Inbox me your number for further details'. To the woman who sent this message to me.. please do me a favour. Sit down and ask yourself is this the lifestyle of a Muslim. Will Allah be pleased with you for engaging in such activities. Allah has blessed you with a partner, a husband He made exclusively for you. Why in the world do you wish to share him with someone else in a haraam way....Whilst I am definitely not a perfect human being.. I'm so sorry to burst your bubble but I don't engage in activities that will direct my soul towards evil..... Always be mindful of your Lord... He is all knowing...all seeing.......I am actually deeply saddened and aggrieved that such activities are occurring within our communities.... Within my scope of practice, I have encountered many individuals who have approached my colleagues and I for help and advice with regards to their sexuality. Some time back, a Muslim man contacted us via facebook messaging stressed at the fact that he is leading a dual life and of course needed help. I am not the type of person who judges another persons sexuality. It is totally their own prerogative. What a person does in their own private time is purely their own business.But what surprised me was the fact that this gentleman got married to the love of his life many years ago and they have a few kids together. A few years ago his wife decided to go into full parda that he supported. Her attitude towards intimacy changed and that is when he steered into a world unknown out of curiosity. He has admitted to enjoying sexual relationships with many men to the point of cross dressing as a woman and enjoying a guys night out at a club. In his opinion there are many Muslim men out there who are closet bisexuals hailing from super wealthy families. He wants to be in an open marriage where both he and his wife can have multiple sexual partners.I am of  the opinion that the more access  people have to pornography through their smart phones, more men and women would steer towards fulfilling their primitive instincts of lust and inner sexual desire. The scary part is that how many kids and teenagers out there have access to such filth. A few days ago I was told that around 30 teenagers were caught in the neighbourhood for taking drugs. How were the drugs obtained? Well, female students residing in the informal settlements were sending pornographic pictures to these young men at school. In return these naive young men had to purchase drugs from them. So its a case of, if you want to see a naked women in an erotic, seductive position, buy a packet of drugs from me first. I often wonder why does a kid of 6 and 7 years need a cellphone. Why do today's parents make their kids too big for their boots. Most community leaders are residing in a bubble pretending that everything is just perfect. I think its about time that these community leaders burst their own bubbles and start addressing these pertinent issues occurring within our communities rather than sweeping it under the carpet as always.

We have lost the plot when it comes to Etiquette and Respect

On Friday I was quite disgusted at the behaviour of a sixteen year old Muslim boy who frequented the pharmacy to collect medication for his parents. His attitude towards my colleague was absolutely appalling. He was rude and abrupt and refused to answer important questions despite my colleague responding to him in a polite manner. At first I listened, then I could not take it any longer and I decided to step in. All I said was, "Why did you go to the mosque to pray Juma, when your attitude towards others is absolutely disgusting. If you cant respect the people who are trying to assist you, please leave." His face turned red and he then decided to keep his big mouth shut.

At the beginning of Ramadhaan , a 14 year old boy smacked an elderly man because he was reprimanded for making a noise in the masjid. This kind of disruptive bahaviour unfortunately continued for the entire duration of Ramadhaan. A few days ago, kids vandalized a door in the masjid whilst playing around with cold drink bottles. In addition to this they also vandalized a few cars outside the masjid. I think the parents of these kids should be held accountable for the damages caused. Clearly these parents have not brought up their kids in a disciplined manner thereby having no control over them. I don't blame the kids. Kids simply imitate the behaviour of their parents. I was told that the parents of some of these kids have a total disrespect for the masjid as well.Many of these parents are constantly fidgeting and playing around on their mobile phones whilst their kids run a mock disturbing the prayers of people who frequent the masjid sincerely..I think there is a total lack of discipline among the youth due to bad parenting. I think kids below the age of 7 years should not be allowed to frequent the masjid. Kids older than seven years should stand next to their fathers so that they can be properly supervised. The problem with parenting today is this... when a person complains to the parent about the child's bad behaviour or inappropriate actions, the parent becomes defensive. Instead of acknowledging the child's fault and taking action against the child, the parent chooses to fight with the person who's car was vandalized for example. This is why we are producing a generation of kids who are rotten in terms of behaviour and etiquette..Stop taking your child's part if they are wrong. Call me old school but I think corporal punishment should have never ever been abolished....

Teachers are not parents. Your home is your first school. I remember my childhood as though it was yesterday. Whilst dad was not very much the disciplinarian mom definitely was. Etiquette and manners was instilled into us from a very young age. It was almost as though home was an etiquette school. We were taught how to eat, how to sit gracefully, how to behave in the company others. Mom wasn't shy at all to reprimand us in front of anyone. It was her way of teaching us a lesson. Today, when I look back I am not at all sorry for the discipline that was instilled in me. 
Let's leave the children alone, our grown ups lack etiquette and discipline so how will the kids learn good habits. A friend of ours told us yesterday that a lady in pardah almost caused an accident by skipping the stop street. Instead of acknowledging her mistake, she decided to stick out her middle finger for the other motorists in full view of everyone including kids. So on the one hand you acting holy by wearing pardah and on the other hand your behaviour is in total disagreement to Islamic etiquette. To these women my message is clear, first go learn about etiquette and then act all holy by wearing pardah. Behaving badly in public and wearing pardah don't go hand in hand. That's not all. Ramadhaan is a time of change. It is the spring season in the Islamic calendar. It is a time to start afresh and mend your ways. But clearly this does not apply to everyone. A car with "holy" occupants were driving down main reef road full speed, trying to get home on time to break fast. Instead of exercising patience, the driver decided that he was going to hoot and shout at other drivers on the road, shooting through red traffic signals and in the process not only endangering his own life but endangering the lives of others. People like this make me laugh. You might be wearing Islamic attire, showing the whole world that you are a Muslim but your etiquette in public is pathetic, totally against the teachings of Islam. Allah did not say that you need to behave like a hooligan on the roads during Ramadhaan. Plan your day and try getting home on time. If you cant get home on time, break your fast in the car. Islam is practical. It has always been. The followers have made the religion an impractical one.....