Shattered Soul

                                                        Picture courtesy quoteko.com

She was a product of rape. She had an unstable abusive childhood and then she fell in love with a man from an internet dating site. He was 5 years older than her and every single day they would skype each other. She was always against a long distance relationship but after chatting to someone for two years almost everyday you are bound to fall in love. She wanted more. She wanted stability. She decided to catch a flight and made her way to Dubai. Naturally she was over the moon. She met the man of her dreams. But after a week her dreams were shattered and reality set in. The handsome Emirati gentleman she fell in love with was actually a married man. He wanted her to be his mistress only. Along the way she discovered that he was having affairs with a number of local women as well.Saddened with grief she returned to South Africa. She started reflecting on all the hurt and pain she experienced from childhood. For a while she was healing. She was looking forward to starting afresh. This lovely woman happens to be one of our patients and she has been through so much that she refuses to be with anyone. She warns young women out there to be careful with who they associate with over the internet. There are many men on dating sites who only want to be with a woman for sexual favours. It is a known fact that most Arab men are not faithful and sincere when it comes to relationships. Arabs in general can not be trusted. During my stay in the Kingdom I have witnessed the most horrific situations. I knew of foreign women who were abused by their Saudi husbands. Most of them didn't even have access to their passports thereby making it really difficult for the woman to leave the country. The husband on the other hand would have girlfriends in Morocco, Italy and Spain.The one thing I noticed about Arab men is this, they consider their own women as superior to women from other nationalities. They expect their own mothers and sisters to be treated with love, respect and kindness but its perfectly fine to fool around with a foreign woman.They don't realize that this woman is also someone else's sister, daughter, cousin , niece etc..If you are thinking of marrying a foreign man, please make hundred percent sure that you know the person inside out. Get information about the persons family history etc. Visit their country. Go to the police station and get a report about the family. Don't be fooled by a man's good looks.Meet the man's family and friends. Meet his employers and work colleagues. If he doesn't allow you to meet his family, be sure that the man is a liar. He is simply using you.Love is blind... but waiting for a man to love you sincerely and be faithful to you for thy kingdom come is like waiting for a train to pick you up at a petrol station. It just aint gonna happen. Instead of hurting yourself, move on in life and wait for the person that God has written out for you.

Ramadhaan Kareem 2014

I would like to take this opportunity in wishing all my friends and family across the globe a wonderful Ramadhaan Kareem!!!May the Almighty accept your fast and prayers during this blessed month and may it also be a time for reflecting on our inner selves.Let this month be a month where we can all achieve and attain high levels of spirituality. Let this be a month of sharing, giving and a start towards bettering ourselves in every way. Let us all try making a concerted effort towards doing good, helping others and staying away from all activities that goes against Gods will.!!!I dedicate this nasheed to all my Muslim readers. Kindly remember my family and I in your prayers!!!!

Ramadhaan South African Style.

So the blessed month of Ramadhaan is just a stone’s throw away and whilst many in the Arab world would be rejoicing and waiting anxiously for the month of the Quraan to set in, South African aunties are in panic mode making one savoury after the other, literally stocking up the freezer to feed an entire army. But what really fascinates me the most is the huge transformation of South African Muslims during the fasting month. Even the bushcrooks turn into buzrooks....lol..
For a start the television is turned off in every home for the entire duration of the month. Abaya shops are shockingly busy. Even Tassy and Naz who are frequent club goers have joined in the whole spirit of Ramadhaan. On every other day, they parade the shopping centres wearing boob popping tops coupled with a mini skirt and high heels. But for the month of Ramadhaan out comes the Swarovski bejewelled abayas with matching headscarves. No more pouty red lips, false nails and fake eye lashes lol. The neighbourhood suddenly comes to life once again as the neighbours kids quite excitedly visits your home to drop off a platter of savouries. Who’s son are you poppy? I haven’t seen your mummy and daddy the whole year....
Zaks who usually sports a funky hair cut and tries to emulate his favourite soccer star has suddenly grown a tiny beard. The funky branded clothing he usually wears has suddenly been replaced by a designer label thobe. Zaks makes sure he is in the first saf in the masjid at the time of fatoor.
For the entire fasting month, everyone tries their best to be perfect in every single way, until the day of Eid. Tassy, Naz and Zaks get into their luxury vehicles and make their way to the zoo lake to show off their new designer label outfits. Both ladies visited the dress designer three times to get the perfect fit they so desired. Tassy sports a sleeveless long dress with high slits whilst Naz wears a boob tube outfit. I guess if you have the assets why not flaunt it right lol....And whilst Tassy and Naz try to attract the singletons in the crowd, Zaks is trying to impress a young 17 year old lassie, Lemme show you how to groove baby at the club on Saturday night. You so hot, you make the sun feel shy.”

Meanwhile in the magical Kingdom Ramadhaan is special, a feeling that I will never ever be able to explain to anyone. Ramadhaan in the Kingdom is all about family. The entire country is on vacation and whilst everyone relaxes during the day after sunset at the time of breaking fast, the country comes to life. If you in the holy city of Makkah and Medina you will break your fast with millions of people simultaneously. Young Arab children will pull your hand and beg you to join their family for fatoor. There is a spirit of sharing, caring and giving. You become so overwhelmed with joy that tears automatically flow down your cheeks. Ramadhaan in the Kingdom is fun. There is an equal balance between prayer and engaging in fun activities with family and friends. How I long to be in the land of shifting sands for the month of Ramadhaan. But I guess this year I just have to contend with Ramadhaan South African style!

Bold and beautiful is now a reality

                                                 Picture taken from Google images

I thought weird relationships and strange stories only occurred in the movies, but I was shocked at the weird real life stories that are occurring in our own back yard. Had a patient a few weeks ago who totally blew my mind away with his story. He was married to a foreign national for a number of years and was oblivious to the fact that his wife was in actual fact a real life prostitute. He only found out when a friend of his showed him obscene pictures of her floating on the internet. He always thought that his wife was a high flying business woman involved in the import and export business field. Hence she was always loaded with lots of money. The reality though was quite shocking as she turned out to be a high end escort and prostitute accompanying high flying South African businessmen. When he approached his wife with the evidence, she committed suicide. A few years later the man decided to remarry. Whilst he enjoyed a few years of marital bliss he was shocked to discover when his wife fell pregnant that she is in fact HIV positive. He then realized that he had infected his wife and that his first wife had infected him. Luckily with extensive ARV treatment the child was born HIV negative.......... Here's another shocking story, it seems that Muslim socialites residing in the Houghton and Sandton areas are not shy to play the wife swapping and husband swapping game, and let's not forget Laudium men meeting up with bored socialite Houghton and Sandton women in Rosebank hotel rooms. Yes folks, this is the life of the rich and famous within the Muslim community. A patient of ours divorced her husband as he wanted her to join a wife swapping club and also expected her to wear skimpy clothing and visit clubs on a Saturday night which was totally against her principles as a Muslim woman. To add insult to injury she also found out that her daughter in law was chatting up men on various chat sites on the internet. One day she decided to follow her daughter in law who made her way to a Rosebank hotel. There she discovered that the daughter in law was actually chatting up her husband (father in law) who created a fake profile on an internet chat site. Can you imagine the expression on their faces when they met each other. Such disgusting behaviour on the part of the daughter in law and the father in law. A father in law should be an authority of the home, the head of the family and a daughter in law should be concerned about her husband and her family. I guess that is the result of being a bored housewife... After all an idol mind is a devils workshop..I am not a club person at all and I honestly believe that a club is the devil's playground. Men and women dressed in skimpy clothing with loud vulgar music and alcohol flowing is not my idea of fun but with more and more Muslim men and women frequenting such places, it is a clear indication that the Luciferian regime with its head quarters in Hollywood is winning the cause of brainwashing our young people and steering them away from religion and pushing them towards self destruction. I wonder how many of you actually know about Hollywood celebrities and their rise to fame. How many of you know about MK Ultra mind control programming. Hollywood celebrities don't just rise to fame. They were groomed through programming techniques from kids. They have sold their souls to the devil in return for name and fame. Hollywood songs and music all have underline dark themed subliminal messages promoting satanism and of course sex is the main theme. Why sex.... Because sex magic rituals is very much a part of satanism. Our magazines are riddled with subliminal messages that the common man will fail to see. We all get carried away by the beautiful woman on the cover of a magazine wearing skimpy clothing and we all wanna be like her.. The truth is, all those images that we see is air brushed.Wearing mini skirts with bums and boobs hanging out is so cool. Right... Wrong.. Its cheap and trashy. No woman of class and elegance would actually dress that way. I have met many celebs in real life and most of them are actually ugly in reality. Lighting and make up is the trick to beauty. They create an illusion of beauty to the masses who in turn start revering a human being as their God instead of worshiping and revering God Almighty. It is so sad to see millions of people just existing without actually seeing the real world, without really understanding why is the world the way it is...

Band SANAM rocks India

A few weeks ago, Ben Kurian Thomas, a friend of mine who manages the work of many celebrities in Mumbai sent me a clip of the song Ishq Bulaava from the Bollywood movie Hasee Toh Phasee. The song is sung by Sanam Puri from the band SANAM. When I heard the song for the very first time I was captivated by Sanam's beautiful, melodious voice. Naturally, I started following the work of the band and I am pretty sure that they are going to reach a level of super stardom soon. The band has composed a song for the upcoming movie "The Amazing Spiderman- 2" and are well on their way to making a mark in the very competitive music industry in India.I managed to catch up with Samar Puri, a band member and also Sanam's brother.He quite happily agreed to be interviewed by me.

Read on to find out more in his own words.

1. Firstly Samar, thank you so much for taking the time out to be interviewed by me. I am curious to know, who is Sanam and Samar Puri? Tell me a little about your family background and life from childhood until present? Elaborate further on the other band members

As you know, Sanam and I are real brothers, Sanam is the younger one and we have this spiritual connection. :)

We are a Punjabi family.Sanam, Mummy, Papa and I have been together through thick and thin.

One thing I wanna tell you is that we have shifted house a hundred times.. haha. I was born in Muscat and then shifted to Delhi where Sanam was born.  Then Dehradun, Delhi, Noida, Back to Muscat, Delhi and then finally Mumbai. Phew.. We have been changing houses almost every year. We love animals, and have 2 doggies, Cleo & Kai (They are like my kids) :)

Venky S, Who was my batch-mate in Indian School Muscat (Muscat) when we were 15, formed our first band together called 'Distorted' Hahaha.. He used to play rhythm Guitar that time. Musically I've learned a lot from him. After schooling he went to chennai where he met Keshav and they had a band called 'The previous band'. Then Venky went to Bangalore where his family is. He is an amazing jazz/swing singer started doing shows.

Keshav had moved to work with Furtados in Mumbai as brand Manager of Pearl Drums. He was looking for some people he can make music with and we were looking for a drummer. Venky told us about him and it clicked. Thats how the band was formed. Venky used to travel from Bangalore for rehearsals and shows.

2. Do you belong to a musically inclined family? Did you and your brother go for music and singing classes or did it just happen naturally?

We don't belong to a musically inclined family but our papa is an amazing powerful singer but never took it professionally. We took classes when we were young but don't remember anything as we were very small at that time. After that we did everything on our own. Learned from our own experiences and personally we believe in learning on our own. :)

3. How did the band "SANAM" come together?

 As I told you Sanam and I were looking for a drummer in 2009. Venky helped us meet Keshav and then Venky also joined us after we won this Times Music Nationwide Pop band hunt contest called "Supastars'. Around 1,400 bands took part and we bagged the coveted title and had a 3 year contract. After that we changed our name to 'SQS Project' and met Ben Thomas and things got much much better. Many fans asked us what 'SQS Project' stands for and it was a pain to explain. So we decided to change it to 'SANAM' as its a Hindi word that means 'Beloved' or 'Lover', one word, easy to understand and connects with the audience. 

4. What inspired you to be a part of the music industry?

I want to change things for the better & make people happy and do it through music.

5. If you could be granted one wish and have any skill or talent in the world, what would it be?

I have it. Just need to keep learning and get better everyday.

6.  What are your favourite websites? 

illgaming.in for gaming (Best gaming website in India)

Facebook obviously

Then metacritic.com where I check movie, music and game reviews and stuff.

I like watching movies so i check imdb.com.

I love watching this Japanese Anime called 'ONE PIECE' on WatchOP.com

7. I am sure that the female fans are going gaga over you and Sanam...You guys look like twins and are of course good looking. So any plans on the marriage front? Do you have a girlfriend? Does Sanam have a girlfriend?

Marriage.. Its too early to think about it.

Both Sanam and I are single :)

8.  Where do you see the band five years from now? What are your plans for the future?

Our plan is to keep making/writing songs. I believe what we do now becomes the future. We'll just keep working.

9. Define success... What does it mean to you?

If I'm happy, I'm successful. No matter what, always smile. :)

10. How many times a week does the band meet up for practice? How do you train? Does the band have a teacher for guidance?

It depends, We try to rehearse whenever we can. Yes we have a teacher, His name is Ben Thomas (our manager). He's actually more like a friend / brother / father. :)

11. What has been the bands most memorable performance thus far?

Our First show at VJTI college, Mumbai when the crowd was singing our own songs. Nothing can beat that feeling. That day will always be special for Sanam, Venky,Keshav and I.

12. What advise would you give to young aspiring musicians out there?

Keep learning, Never give up. If you're good and your dreams high, Nothing can stop you!

Thank you Samar for taking the time to answer these questions. Desert Moon wishes you all the best in your future endeavours!!! This is definitely one of the most inspiring interviews that I have ever done. I am so honoured and proud to have interviewed a band that is all set and ready to make an impact globally. Thank you for giving me this opportunity.

Check out the band's latest song they composed for the movie " The Amazing Spider-Man 2"

Some of their other hit songs include "Ishq Bulaava" and " Teri Aankhon se"

The man behind " An Emerging Mystery"

When I made the decision to move to Riyadh a few years ago, I was bombarded with negative comments from friends and family with regards to Arab people and the Arab culture. I was told that within a month I would return to South Africa as Arabs are extremely bad people. Of course, I did not allow these opinions to influence my mindset and perception of the region. In every country you can find the good, the bad and the ugly.  I had the best time of my life in Saudi Arabia. I met and interacted with people from all over the globe and my best friends are now Saudis. Personally, I believe that the media is partly to be blamed for projecting the nation in a negative light.  However, one gentleman in particular, an Englishman now residing in the Middle East is creating waves across the Gulf through his photography. Sebastian Farmborough aims to showcase the Kingdom of Saudi Arabia in a positive light through his own personal interactions with the local people of the country. It was an absolute pleasure conversing with him and I want to thank him for taking the time out to answer my questions. Read on to find out more in his own words...

1. So, tell me, who is Sebastian Farmborough? 
Well, that's a good question. Nobody has asked me that one before and to be honest with you, it is not something I have given a great deal of thought to. Photography is my life and producing images that move people is what it is all about for me.I was born and educated in England, but since then I have lived in the US, Spain, Saudi Arabia, Chile and now the United Arab Emirates. I love languages and interacting with different cultures, it makes me feel as though i am constantly learning something which I value greatly. 

2. Who or what inspired you to become a photographer?  
 It was the work of Bill Brandt that drew me into the world of photography, before that I wanted to be an architect. I became captivated by the way he used light and texture to mislead the onlooker into seeing something that was actually never there. 

3. When and why did you move to Saudi Arabia? What is it about Saudi culture that fascinates or intrigues you?
I moved to Saudi Arabia from Spain in 2003. Spain is a wonderful place, but I knew that financially I was not going to be able to advance my photographic aspirations there. While the principle motivator behind the move might have been a monetary one. I also wanted to find out what the region was really like, having been in Manhattan during September the 11th and exposed to the media coverage that followed. My friends and relatives strongly advised me not to go, but I was sceptical and wanted to find out for myself. 

What fascinates me most about Saudi culture is that it is so misunderstood. Saudis actually have a great many qualities which we Westerners would do well to learn from. I really envy how close their family relationships are and admire their generosity and hospitality. The respect they show to elder generations is wonderful and their sense of humour really was a pleasant surprise. 
However, the best thing about Saudi Arabia is Ramadan. During that month, it is impossible to walk down the street at sunset without somebody inviting you into their home to break the fast. It is inclusive, it does not matter if you have a family or not, or whether you are the same religion or not, everyone just wants you to join in and that spirit really is infectious.  

4. Whilst the rest of the world has a negative perception about the Kingdom and its people, particularly Saudi women, why have you decided to portray them in such a positive light? 
Personally, I am fed up of seeing images of veiled women that look like obscure, oppressed objects and of angry looking bearded men. It is no wonder that the Western perception of the Kingdom is so negative.  I had some wonderful experiences there and I found it very disheartening when my well educated Western friends just did not believe me. They often accused me of being brainwashed, which is ironic really. 
There is a different side to Saudi Arabia, one which the Western media has failed to cover. It is that which I plan to portray. I am an artist, not a journalist so I can choose to focus on the positive. Of course, this is not the whole story, but these are chapters that have yet to be told and I am convinced that they would better enable Westerners to understand and ultimately accept such a dramatically different culture from their own. 

5. What advise would you give to expats residing in the Kingdom?
There are two types of expats in the Kingdom, those who focus on what they cannot do and those that focus on what they can. My advice is to make sure you are the latter. Learn Arabic and get out there and meet the people. I know this is more difficult for women, but you can find ways. Integration is so rewarding. Try and find the best of both worlds.

6. What is your opinion with regards to the polygamous relationships that exist in the Middle East?
Personally, I would not want to be involved in a polygamous relationship. I do not believe that you can love in equal measure, but I do understand the reasoning behind it.  

7. What do you think about interfaith marriages?
The romantic in me would like to think that love conquers all, but a marriage is between two families, not just two people so it does represent a major stumbling block, particularly once the children arrive.  Personally, I wouldn't mind my wife being of another faith, but how would her family react? And how would we raise our children? See what I mean, it's complicated. 

8.  If you could be granted one wish and have any skill or talent in the world, what would it be?
Oh, that is an easy one, I would like to be an awful lot better at learning languages. It would be amazing to be able to communicate with everyone. 

9.  What are your favourite websites? 
Favourite websites, hmm, i would probably have to say Facebook. I have moved around so much over the years that if it weren't for that one, I wouldn't have any friends. 

10.  Where do you see yourself five years from now? What are your plans for the future?
Once I have reduced the misconceptions surrounding Saudi Arabia. I would like to do the same with Iran or indeed Pakistan. These three countries are where most of my friends are from and that certainly would not have been the case had I paid attention to our media. 
My photography is all about cross-cultural communication and making people realise that essentially we are all the same. 

11. Define success... What does it mean to you?
Success for me is to leave a legacy. I love the idea that my photographs will continue to bounce around the globe long after I am gone.

Once again, thank you Sebastian for taking the time to answer these questions. Desert Moon wishes you all the best in your future endeavours!!! 

Check out Sebastian Farmborough's interview on BBC ARABIC