Letter from a prisoner - Ramadhaan behind bars

The New York Times

I have spent 9 Ramadhaans behind bars at 3 different prisons. Every Ramadhaan was different for different reasons and due to different circumstances but one thing was the same in all; no matter how many walls and gates confine my physical self, the barakah that the month brings transcends it all and brings with it sakeenah that sets my soul free. Ramadhaan has always been my favourite time of the year, despite the worst day of my life also being in this month.

The prison system allows for religious practices and for Muslims there are specific concessions made for this blessed month. The main change in the prison is that Muslim inmates are housed together in 1 cell. This helps Muslims to be able to not only pray together but to experience some semblance of quiet and respect for prayer; as well as being able to be in an environment where everyone has the same intentions. Prison policies dictate many other concessions but these are merely on paper as no Muslim authorities ever assist in their complete implementation. 

Naturally, the prison environment presents a new dynamic to the month. My first Ramadhaans were in communal cells. A communal cell generally accommodates 40 men but for Ramadhaan they squeeze around 70 into 1 cell. We did not mind this, if anything it helped to create a better atmosphere. Double bunks were transformed into quadruple bunks in order to create a permanent space for salaah, with the guys on the top literally brushing the roof as they turned in bed; whilst others preferred to rather sleep on the floor. 

The spirit of the brothers for the month meant that even staying in such conditions did not bother them. This was even true when it came time for whudu and the toilet. 70 men sharing 1 toilet and 2 basins is quite a logistical nightmare when it comes to getting ready for salaah, and especially for fajr. Some would take it upon themselves to play the role of bathroom manager in efforts to streamline the process, while others volunteered themselves to clean the bathroom continuously. 

Ramadhaan is supposed to be a time of giving up food but the reality in the world is that food becomes more of a priority in Ramadhaan than out of it. In prison, the same is true to an extent. One Ramadhaan, I was able to eat home food almost everyday for iftaar. One Ramadhaan I lived largely on bread and milk. Allah always made a way though for me to be able to break every fast with dates, and sometimes even with zamzam. The prison gives the guys 5 slices of bread, powder milk, sugar and either jam or peanut butter for sehri. For iftaar, guys keep their prison lunch. Breaking fast hours after being given the food means that the food is cold, so guys come up with ingenious ways to warm up food. Anything from a bucket of boiling water, placing packets inside a kettle, wedging food between hot water bottles and clothing irons are used, to great effect! 

The brotherhood that is shown at meal times is remarkable. I have had the fortune of making iftaar in Madinah Munawwarah where one is literally pulled to join the host in iftaar. In prison, I have witnessed a similar spirit. Even though most have only the essentials, they vie with one another in sharing and in providing for each other; sometimes even becoming physical in efforts to be the ones to serve others. 

All prisons have a shop inside the prison that sells basic groceries. These are a huge help especially during Ramadhaan. Items such as tea, coffee, margarine, instant porridge and the like make sehri and iftaar much more pleasant. Regardless of what we have to eat, joy still abounds at iftaar. 

The past few Ramadhaans have been in the midst of winter. This brings great challenges to us. For instance, making whudu with icy water at sehri, or worse still having to make a fardh ghusl, tests one in ways one cannot imagine. It also does not help that prisons have constant power outages, owing to defunct infrastructure or simply because of load shedding. One Ramadhaan, for almost 2 weeks there was no electricity. This meant no hot meals for that time, no hot water to bath or make whudu and no lights to do anything in. 

These conditions prove really difficult at times for someone like me who grew up as a Muslim and has been fasting since the age of 6. It is infinitely more difficult for men in prison as 99% of them became Muslim in prison. Imagine spending your first Ramadhaan, as a middle aged man, in these type of conditions? It really tests the faith of everyone. 

Seeing as most inmates have never seen the inside of a masjid, most never heard of taraweeh. It is natural then that many find the idea of 20 rakaats rather daunting. In all my years though, I have never had a single person complain about  the length of taraweeh; instead everyone remains committed and is up for the challenge. Some issues however do creep in, but nothing that is not faced in masjids too; like issues over whether the lights should be on or off, or whether the windows should be open or not. 

For some, fasting proves to be a bit too much. It is not uncommon to have someone being caught sneaking into a quiet cell during the day to have a quick bite or more often than not a quick cigarette. Others will feign sickness to get a few days off. The general attitude towards this is compassion and empathy as opposed to aggression or ridicule. 

As someone who is always the imaam and looked up to by the revert Muslims, I cannot help but feel for them and all I can do is to encourage them. It does not sadden me that some of my fellow brothers cannot fast properly, pray properly or read the Quran. Rather it saddens me that in a city like Johannesburg which is full of darul-ulooms and ulema that there is hardly any support at all for Muslim inmates. Yes, some have done terrible unspeakable crimes, but the day they became Muslim, Allah says He forgave all of their past transgressions, so it is time the community and in particular the ulema changed their attitude and assisted.

Don't judge a book by its cover says the old adage. I have learnt and continue to learn that lesson in prison. I spent one Ramadhaan in a single cell with a revert who was extremely passionate about learning. He reminded me of the stories of the sahabah (RA), for they implemented everything they were taught immediately. I taught him about tahajjud and for the year that he was with me, he never missed it for a single night. Another brother learnt how to read arabic, last Ramadhaan he completed the Quraan. It took him on average 4 hours to complete one juz, but he persevered and achieved what so many do not despite their abilities. Last Ramadhaan, I spent with a 50 year old ex-Hindu pundit. By the end of the month he could read Arabic and knew a few surahs by memory.   Another image that will always be etched in my memory is one of 4 or 5 men sharing 1 candle in order to read Quraan.

Inspiration is all around us, no matter where we are. The blessing of this blessed month are also all around us, no matter where we are.